Nearly there...

In 10 days I will be landing in the Orlando International Airport.  It’s hard to believe those words are true. I remember nearly four months ago, it was hard to believe that the words were true when I as reminded that I was leaving the country for four months.  But here we are, four months later, and it’s time to return home. I think I must have blinked, because I don’t know where all the time went. My time here in Madagascar has been nothing short of a life changing experience.  And I suppose a lot of people could say that about a lot of different “experiences.” But these four months are a chapter in my life that God has used to mold me just a little more in to the finished product he has intended me to be from before time began.  I could sit here on this couch and type story after story of all that has taken place here; but, I honestly don’t have the patience, nor do I have the time. And it would spoil the epic story time that will commence upon our return.  I would much rather share a little with you what God has revealed to me.

It’s hard to explain what I have learned in one statement. If I had to try, I would say that my insignificance in this world has been made real, but God… I have always loved that in the Bible: “but God.” I have seen a little bit more of the world since I have left America.  And it’s the same everywhere. Evil is prevalent in this world. Humans are wicked and wretched by nature. Unconditional love is a foreign concept and a rarity. And we are a sinful race that deserves to die a spiritual death. But GOD. But God has already conquered the evil, and we can consider the battle to come already won. But God loves man anyway despite our nature, and He understands the deepest desires, needs, and passions of our hearts. But God offers an unconditional love that no man could ever be capable of giving. But God sent His son, so that we have a way to spend forever in His presence.

When I first arrived to Madagascar, I was so preoccupied with what I had to offer. What could I do to make this trip worthwhile? What words could I speak that would lead people to Jesus? What actions did I need to carry out, for people to wonder “why are they different”? Day after day I was discouraged. I felt inadequate, ill-equipped… I didn’t have what it took to be a missionary in another country, away from my home.  After each daily failure, I was reminded that I didn’t have what it took to be radical.

As the weeks went by, God spoke to me.  He told me “It isn’t you who leads people to Me, it’s Me within you.” This isn’t a new truth to me, but it has been made more real than it ever has. We are merely vessels and our time here is but a vapor. God doesn’t need us. But God uses us. The difference that these people see in us, the good that they see, is not from us at all. It is only Jesus. And so my confidence in carrying out His will isn’t in myself anymore, but in Him. My confidence is in in the God who created this world from nothing. My confidence is in the God who defeated death. My confidence is in the God whose love is more faithful than the morning.

I have learned the importance of understanding that I truly am NOTHING apart from Christ. But God values us as much as He values His son. And He views His children as the perfect finished product He knows we will all be when His work in us is complete upon Christ’s return. We are so insignificant. We are nothing. And He doesn’t need any one of us. But God desires so much for us to know that we are loved by the Creator of the universe, and He deems us significant.

And so I know that there are opportunities here in Madagascar that I have missed to share Christ. There are moments that I let go by because of a choice I made. And my flesh gets in the way. I’m too tired, or I don’t have the motivation to leave the house into a world that doesn’t speak my language.  Every day, my weaknesses are made so evident to me. But the beauty is, in my weakness He is made strong. And even when I fail, when I can’t do it, His will and His work in this place will be carried out despite me. And that’s a comforting and humbling truth.

I guess I say all this because it has really changed how I view myself. It has changed my relationship with my Father. The weight, the pressure, it’s not on me. He already carried the cross for me. It’s our call and commandment to simply be obedient. And to be “simply obedient,” isn’t very simple a lot of the times.  It’s hard. But His power within us enables us to do all things. And so I guess this is a challenge to all of you. When God calls you to be radical, don’t allow your lack of knowledge, lack of experience, lack of courage or life’s obstacles hinder your obedience. Because the truth is, without Christ, you are incapable. But God within you makes anything possible!

And don’t think that being radical has to look like moving to another country, away from your comforts, your family, or your friends, to be a missionary. To make the conscious decision every morning to deny yourself and serve Christ, no matter how God has planned for that to look in your life…that is radical. Being radical is purely following Christ. 

See you soon!

-Dannielle